When adult children scold their parents for not having divorced and living together without love
Today, so many psychologists and coaches teach people how to live correctly and build relationships! And it seems that there should be more happy families, more happy marriages. But it turns out that there are still many divorces. In my childhood, I remember seeing very few divorced women among the neighbors. Of course, they existed. But not as many as today. Nowadays, in our apartment building, there are many women among our neighbors who are raising children alone. And sometimes, these women have different men. Some have what seems to be a permanent man, but he is not a husband and comes by once a week.
They might be mistresses, or just divorced women, or maybe they've never been married; it's unclear. Today, we know very little about those who live in the neighboring entrance or even in the adjacent apartment. But one thing is clear – everyone lives as best as they can. And the same psychologists also teach differently. If one says that you should try to keep the family together, not to destroy the Marriage, it can involve years of counseling attempts to help a couple maintain their relationship. In contrast, another might immediately say that there’s nothing to save, that it’s not worth trying, because one should only love oneself and strive to be a happy person. If the partner does not understand that, they are not meant to be together.
But everything is individual. I know couples who argue constantly but love each other, and they cannot be without one another; they are just hot-tempered and passionate. Their children see great love; they do not notice the quarrels, or their mother's tears and their father's shouts after they have argued, because the couple resolves everything and reconciles. From the outside, it may seem like they live like a cat and a dog, but there is love there, and most importantly, there is honesty and trust. And the most important thing is that they feel good together. Then there are families where the husband cheats on the wife for years, deceives her, and she cries at night because of it, but in public, they appear to be a happy family. It varies from case to case. The husband may drink, the wife may not respect him, and they may deceive each other. Friends, living a double life, but not getting a divorce. Is that right? Everyone has their situation and their truth. Perhaps it is right. It's not for us to judge, of course. "When people get divorced, it always seems like such a tragedy.
Meanwhile, the tragedy can be the decision to continue living together. If both spouses understand that things will only get worse, that they cannot make the relationship better if everything is already filled with lies and hatred, then isn't it better to get divorced? And then, perhaps, each of them will find a partner with whom they will be happier. By the way, grown-up children often reproach their parents for not getting divorced, but living together for their sake. They say it would be better if they divorced; then the children would see a happy mom and a dad satisfied with life, even if not in the same house, even with other people. Children also suffer when their parents argue, insult each other, and sometimes even fight. Don't they worry about their crying mother, who their father hurt? After all, they are their closest and dearest ones, who are suffering.
And sometimes divorce is better for everyone. It's time to get divorced when both understand that things will not get better while they are together. And when both, having seriously thought it through, conclude that it will not be better for the children either. Some might say that it is stressful for any child when parents divorce. But isn't it stressful for children to see their father raise a hand against their mother? What do you think is better for the children? "When two people have decided to divorce, it doesn't mean they don't understand each other. On the contrary, it means that they have finally understood each other," Says Helen Rowland. My opinion is this: nobody knows how life will turn out.
But if people have gotten married, if they have decided to live together and raise children together, it implies a huge responsibility that many do not realize. And spouses should no longer think only of themselves, only of their desires and ambitions; they need to think about the family and the future, putting pride aside. And, of course, it is better not to let it reach divorce; one should try in advance. Do something to improve relationships while there are still no serious problems. 'No one is forced into marriage, but everyone must be compelled to obey the laws of marriage once they enter into it. What do you think?
